How to have a fluent English conversation

Good conversation is about people taking turns to produce something beautiful together. The timing of this dance between people in conversation is extremely precise in English .The average space between turns in a conversation is 200 milliseconds. 

That's really fast. But actually it is not the most interesting thing you see. If I show you an object and tell you what is the time it takes for your eyes to process the image and then for your brain to go and retrieve that vocabulary and sound information ready to speak is 600 milliseconds .

But the average between terms is only 200 milliseconds that means that we actually prepare to speak before the other person finishes. We  also know exactly when they are going to finish. But how do we know that knowing when the other person is about to stop speaking ? It is an ability that comes with practice . 

The ability to detect when the other person is about to finish speaking is really important because of a simple rule in English.

Silence 

The one second rule ,in English , We don't like silence . Silence is uncomfortable .In fact research shows that silences longer than just one second indicates three very bad things:

 you don't understand what person is saying .
 you don't like what the other person is saying .
 you are about to say something negative.

Now if you do have those long pauses in your conversation terms, you need to eliminate them.If we want to eliminate those long pauses and have a really fluent conversation. there are four essential things to learn:

The first one is how to take control , how to take your turn to speak.

There are three ways you can do to take your turn to speak 

 Buffers

Buffers are those meaningless no content words like ( you know , well , um ) 
they create that space that allows you to start your   turn .

 Competitive interruption 

You don't want  to do this too often, other wise,  you will seem rude and like you are not listening but it is also a great strategy for taking a control.

 Reinforces ( Yeah, Really, Wow _)

By reinforcing by supporting their story again it gives you the opportunities to come in and take your turn.

The second one how to hold on that control

So you can continue expressing yourself now again you can use

 Buffers ( like , something , uh)

And again by using a buffer by filling that space with a sound it indicates that you know you are not ready for the other person to come in that you are still in the flow of your conversation.

 Simultaneous talking

So basically when they try to come in , they think you have finished they see the spaces. They try to come in and you continue talking at the same time. Normally,  the other person will stop. So again the same as in competitive interruption you don't want to do simultaneous talking a lot because it can seem rude.

The third one is to pass control how to finish your turn

When you said everything that you want to say.

Intonation 

Now the first way you can do that is using your voice with intonation , pitch or loudness by elongating that final syllable by dropping your pitch or volume.they are all great ways to indicate that you have finished speaking.

Buffers

The next one is buffers , different types of buffers ( you got the ideas , so on and so on or any way )
All indicate that you are ready for the other person to take their turn in conversation.

Questions 

Asking questions , I don't think that there is any better way to tell the other person that you want them to speak than by asking them a question. It is also in general just a great way to elevate conversation to the next level by asking questions and it is also a great way to elevate conversation to the next level by asking question.

The final one is how to support your control

How to help the other person to continue speaking. Now there are nonverbal ways that we can do this like with gestures and eye contact but I am going to focus on language.

The final thing is supporting or control

I can't support it enough , when you enter into a conversation with somebody , you enter into obligation to support them when they are speaking. It is not just about waiting for your turn to speak . It is a bout dance this magic cooperation.

Reinforces 

So the first way you can support them again is with reinforces like ( oh my god , amazing , really )

Clarification

The next thing you can do is ask for clarification. (really, so on the right, ah you mean like the big one)

Cooperative Interruptions

This is a type of cooperative interruptions. Cooperative interruptions might be when you help them to finish their sentences or may be you are adding some extra details you think will help them to tell their story better. Supporting control is super important .Please do not ignore it.

The sequences of not following these conversation rules  can actually be quite severe if in a conversation you never pass control then you will be labelled as a motormouth who never shuts up and everybody is going to avoid conversation with you.

Conversely if you never take a control .Then you could be labelled as a passive and timid and not get that job you want.


In general, it could mean that you have difficulty participating in conversation and expressing yourself and integrating your society.

Now what is a really important way that bad for bad passing control?  Silence (  do not do it).

 But there is actually one other consequence which is much more important for learner.

Research 

2000 researchers from the university of Victoria performed a very simple experiment , they invited people to come in their laboratory and tell a stranger an exciting story from their lives but there was a twist the strangers who were listening to the stories had to press a button under the table every time they heard the letter T.

Normally when a person listen to the story they produce a specific type of response every 27 seconds but because they were so distracted by listening for the letter T by pressing the button , they only produced this response every 125 and a half minutes.

But it is not the effect on the listener that were interested in the person telling the story wasn't receiving all of the normal feedback that the story was interesting or surprising and being understood and they should continue. They weren't being supported by listener. The effect was that they become less fluent , less coherent and they paused and hesitated more .

The listener actually had an effect on the speaker's fluency. You control the fluency of the other person  but the really negative effect is that it makes the person who are trying to speak to more difficult for you to understand. Obviously a really important question us can  you learn and practice those skills? Absolutely yes.

Now I am going to show you a few ways that you can do

 Now the first one is if you want to practice alone and you are going to practice by utilizing the noticing hypothesis is basically by paying attention by noticing you are going to increase your abilities.

So all you need is an interview. Go on the You Tube  on the internet and find now. Don't use a film or a television series because they are  scripted. It is not natural dialogue you want something spontaneous. 2000 researchers from the university of Victoria performed a very simple experiment , they invited people to come in their laboratory and tell a stranger an exciting story from their lives but there was a twist the strangers who were listening to the stories had to press a button under the table every time they heard the letter T.

Normally when a person listen to the story they produce a specific type of response every 27 seconds but because they were so distracted by listening for the letter T by pressing the button , they only produced this response every 125 and a half minutes.

But it is not the effect on the listener that were interested in the person telling the story wasn't receiving all of the normal feedback that the story was interesting or surprising and being understood and they should continue. They weren't being supported by listener. The effect was that they become less fluent , less coherent and they paused and hesitated more .

The listener actually had an effect on the speaker's fluency. You control the fluency of the other person  but the really negative effect is that it makes the person who are trying to speak to more difficult for you to understand. Obviously a really important question us can  you learn and practice those skills? Absolutely yes.

So what you do is watch the interview and at the moment when you think the person is going to pass their turn when you think they are getting to stop speaking and they want the other person to speak .

 You pause the video just pause it and then think to yourself okay "what  would I say or how I would control the conversation at that moment ?" and then unpause .See if you were correct.

In fact they were getting ready to stop speaking and they were trying to pass that turn on and you can also do the same thing with your continuous when you are trying to encourage the other person to continue speaking.

Tools

Videos are good because they have all the other elements like hand gestures and eye contact but you can do this with a radio interview or podcast with any spontaneous speech and the best thing that it is a totally free and you don't need any special resources.

But the best way to practice is with another person and these day there is no excuse you can find always find someone you practice online.

At the end of this blog, I hope you will leave a comment to support us.